It should come as no surprise to most people that FetLife topped the list and was named the best BDSM dating site of the year. It is an online community of over five million fetishists and the most popular dating site in the world with over 10 million users.
Alternatives to Fetlife
Those that have been on the kink scene for a while will probably found themselves on Fetlife, and probably have one or more Fetlife profiles. Fetlife as a great free way to meet other fellow kinksters, perve at peoples pictures or simply see who else is in their area. Fetlife has been an amazing help in getting BDSM and Kink out into the world and allowing people to meet each other, visit munches and generally explore the varied world of kink.
The problem with Fetlife is that is can be clunky, the navigation is hard work, simply the developer of fetlife did not seem to have the user in mind then the site was created. This can leave you frustrated and frankly spending a lot of time tying to find that profile you saw of that person you liked the look of but finding you can you scroll through pages and pages of profiles before you can find them again.
This frustration combined with the slightly cliquey nature of Fetlife lead us to look at the alternatives on the market.
We have a list of good Fetlife Alternatives for you to look at and get a profile on. Why not most have free options and who knows you might meet someone to play with.
We know that there is more out there than Fetlife, so we below look at websites like fetlife, or dating sites you can use to find fellow kinksters like yourself.
Websites Similar Fetlife:
ALT.com
Alt.com is one of the Grand Daddies in online Fetish dating sites. The site has been around as long as I have been on the internet and it does not seem to be going anywhere. With a huge amount of profiles on there is is clear to see why a number of people have profiles on Alt. Go to Alt.com Here
Pro’s of Alt.com
Alt.com claims to have the second larget database of any adult dating site, and that is saying something. Considering the age of Alt.com we are not surprised there is a lot of profiles on there.
The forums on alt are pretty amazing with a lot to choose from in terms of kinks and BDSM to talk about. The forums are very active and you will get a lot of answers to your questions and suggestions. We have joined the Alt platform in the past to discuss idea’s for websites such as this one with a captive audience of fellow kinksters.
The search function of Alt is another reason we like Alt especially as an alternative to Fetlife, you can select and search Alt by area, country, sex, kink interest and on and on. One the Free membership there are less options than on the paid membership, but the free options are still far better than the constant scrolling needed to navigate Fetlife.
Downsides for Alt.com
Alt.com is huge in terms of users, this can be a great benefit but some of the users are more active than others. Due to this we have found that the number of replies we got to messages have been mixed, some members responded straight away, others took some time and others did not respond at all. This seems obvious to anyone who has used Fetlife, not everyone responds on there but you get the feeling some of the users on Alt are no longer active or they are not real.
Kinky Dating Site Ratings:
Kinky Level: 9/10
Usability 10/10
Effectiveness 7/10
Tinder:
Now as an alternative to Fetlife, Tinder does not seem like the most obvious choice but hear me out on this one. Tinder has the benefit of being able to find people in your area or an area you would like to look at. Also Tinder is based on images and you can kind of guess if a person is into kink sometimes, you know some of those tell tale signs that the person may well also be a fellow BDSM lover. You can literally flick through the images, judging, guessing, one by one. Seeing if they are into the kink as well as you.
Tinder as an alternative to Fetlife
Pro’s of Tinder as an alternative to Fetlife:
You have lots of people to choose from on Tinder, the man, woman and their dog are on Tinder. Tinder is free to use mostly unless you want to have unlimited back tracking etc etc but in the whole its a free dating site. You also have the benefit of making your own profile look a bit kinky, doing so will bring out the fellow kinksters as well as the freaks and desperate.
Cons of Tinder as a Fetlife Similar Alternative:
Well firstly it is not either an BDSM dating site nor is it a “adult” dating site, it is a standard dating site, but kinksters date as well right? But sure you are literally fishing in a large lake looking for the rare fish so it will take time to use it to find fellow kinksters. Also if you do what I suggest and make your image and profile kinky then you will get all and sundry coming and messaging you. Also you will have every reader of 50 shades of grey professing to their unyielding love of kinky, only to find they mean they have once tried bondage when drunk.
Fetish.com BDSM Dating site
when looking for an alternative to fetlife Fetish.com is a more obvious choice as an option than say Tinder. With Fetish.com you have a similar active group of people to Fetlife. There are some numbers for users of Fetish.com which is 150,000 which given that it is a global site is not that many. On the plus side is that of the 150,000 most are active users of Fetish.com, meaning that this is a true number for users who activly reply to messages and go on the live chat function on the site.
Pro’s of Fetish.com as an similar alternative to Fetlife:
There is some real benefits to the navigation of Fetish.com over Fetlife, this could be my own personal influence here as I really dislike the way in which you have to click on link after link to find people in your own town on Fetlife. On fetish.com you can locate people near you with a simple search.
There is a lot for everyone on Fetish.com, when you fill out your profile you can chose from a wide list of fetishes, over 256 to be precise. Also there is a lot here for the LGBTQ community, with plenty of topic for all interests. The forum is a buzzing community on Fetish.com and is easy to navigate and find post of interest to yourself. Also there is a good blog area that is well written and covers a whole slew of subject from how to write your profile to the ins and outs of the fetishes on the list of interests.
There is a free membership option, although you are limited with the free membership it gives you enough freedom to move around the site and get you know it.
Negatives of Fetish.com as an Fetlife alternative:
The site is quite well made, but on certain browsers including Google Chrome there are a few issues, these may have of been a temporary issue at the time of the review process. There is the limited number of members, if you live in smaller towns you may find it hard to find someone local to you. This being said, the people on the site seem active and the membership is growing, so keep an open mind.
Websites Similar to Fetlife
The emphasis on community rather than pure voyeurism attracts BDSM followers and helps them establish a part of their sexual identity. It’s an enthusiastic community, where you can find plenty of resources to sway, but you can decide where to stay if you’re not BDSM-oriented.
BDSMlr for BDSM Fetlife Alternative
Niche dating sites increase your chances of finding a serious partner who explores the same inclinations as you, rather than relying on traditional sites. There are many other options for those interested in a more intimate relationship, but they are not as popular as Fetlife.
Most users are based in the US and are open to their type of kinks, even though it is not a fetish dating site. This is best for kinky-minded people who can no longer use Tumblr, or a community that calls itself Humblr but can still use it, as long as both consenting adults agree.
For example, r / r4r and r / redditors themselves are grown up – just subreddits who hit people for almost everything. The personal area has an area for men looking for women, women looking at men and those looking for a non-sexual meeting. It offers them a variety of options, such as sex, sex or even sex with other people.
The way – to the place for kinky dating was Craigslist’s staff until Craigslist was forced to streamline its website. But most of us forget to put it in Craigslist’s “Personals” section, and there’s not much difference between it and the personal space on r / r4r.
Ashley Madison as a Similar Website Alternative to Fetlife
This is because Ashley Madison is similar to CL Personals in that both sides are in the same niche (i.e. connections). So if you’re looking for a Craigslist Personal Alternative, it’s not as much of an alternative as you might be used to, but it’s a great alternative to Craigslist’s Personals section and a much better alternative for kinky dating.
If you want to use FetLife for dating purposes, find a geographically appropriate personal group, read the rules, place an ad and respond to those who post posts, but not directly to posts.
If you want to broaden your search a little, there are other similar sites you can use to find people who have fallen into the same buck as you. Alt.com I was impressed, but I am looking forward to expanding my collection of dating sites. Then take a look at our list of the most popular online dating sites in the USA and Canada.
Fetlife Alternative
You will have no problem finding a BDSM partner on Fetlife and you need not worry about being excluded in any way. Similar to the other pages on this list, Doublelist is not BDSM-specific, but it is open to all sexual orientations and gender identities. There has been a great opportunity to list fetishes, curiosities and boundaries, as well as a host of other options.
If you are looking for a partner who will bring the kink to life, or just want to chat with someone who shares your fetish, you should sign up. Satisfied with community forums and a bdsm meeting place, fetlife offers a great opportunity to engage people intellectually without the need for a convention. The events section of the website is also very actively updated, allowing you to get an idea of what is happening in your area and to create a list of events. FetLife is home to millions of people, just like you and me, so be honest with each other.
If you are interested in exploring a corner of sexuality that you did not have before, or if you cannot get your kinky fix from other dating websites, FetLife is worth your time. If you’re in the kink world and craving something more than vanilla sex, you should sign up.
Craigslist as a Fetlife Alternative
The website has a ton of BDSM models to try out, and you can even do your own self-twisting crap if you want. FetLife is one of the best alternatives to Craigslist for personal use, because it is open not only to people who like to kink, but also to be people.
As for the functionality of dating sites and affiliation sites, I must be honest, FetLife is not the most practical place for this activity. The primary purpose of Fet life is to find people who are interested in kinks and / or other forms of sexual activity, and so I couldn’t put it in the same category as other dating sites like Craigslist.com, but it still has many great features, such as the ability to connect with other people, but it’s not the most practical for these activities.